Why should you care about your cleanly apartment or home? The answer is pretty simple.

Most guy’s places are NOT clean.

Really?

We’ve spoken to a lot of girls, and they are all actually surprised, sometimes in awe, to see a guy’s place that is clean.

A clean place is really the exception, NOT the norm. You have a chance to separate yourself from the other guys and make a really good first impression. You aren’t some beta slob. You are the alpha male. An alpha male is going to have his shit together. So, stop making excuses. Seriously, this process will require a small investment of time, money, and elbow grease, but it will pay big dividends in the end

What does your place subcommunicate?

You never get a second chance to make a first impression.

We’ve heard it over and over again, and in this case, it’s true. Everything about you reflects back on you as a person. Having a clean apartment not only says you can take care of your stuff, but it also indicates you take care of yourself!

A clean place says that you are organized. You are mature. It’s all common sense really. Even your car reflects on you, you don’t have to own a Ferrari to be impressive, but if you take care of whatever you have, you communicate to her that you value things. You can take care of things. AND, you can take care of her.

Having a well-organized place will also make her feel more comfortable. No one wants to be checking over her shoulder in case that giant rat comes out of the hole in your couch to claim the last piece of pizza. Let’s move on to the specifics of a clean apartment…

The Living Room

You want to make your living space appealing to all the senses. Your place should have a theme to it. Take a few minutes, ask a friend, figure out your style, and then start getting some accessories and furniture that represents YOUR style. Me, my style is very minimalist and modern. I have some Japanese shoji wood window panes I made myself and some light colored couches. I have some pictures I’ve taken myself, mounted in some nice frames. That kind of stuff makes for great conversation. Have stories about things… “that reminds me about the time I …”.
Also, 2 other important things are candles and lighting. Get some plain candles, and a few scented ones. Drop that college style lamp with the black disk thingy on top. If you have a lot of electronics and crap lying around, organize that stuff. Get some boxes, shelves, anything. I don’t want to trip over a wire and burn down the apartment when I’m trying to hand my girl a glass of wine.

Some important things to do:

• Vacuum once a week. If you don’t have one BUY ONE!
• Get a duster, dust and wipe down stuff every 2 weeks.
• Steam clean your floor every 3-4 months.
• Spray some Febreze or light your candles every few days. Make it smell nice.
• Use Folex for those random carpet stains. This product is amazing.

The Bathroom

Your bathroom will make or break you, plain and simple. If you have a scary bathroom, the girls will turn, run away, and never look back.

When you go number 1, it’s going to splash. There is no getting around that. You may not smell it but very one else can. You HAVE to clean your bathroom.

Some important things to do:

• MOP the floor at least once a week with all purpose cleaner either Pinesol or Lysol
• Use Tilex and mildew remover for the nasty spots on the sink or tub every few weeks.
• Use scented candles or air fresheners. It’s common courtesy. No one wants to smell that.
• Get lots of toilet paper. Spend an extra dollar to get the better kind, and keep a roll on display.

Nothings more embarrassing than a woman asking you where you store the toilet paper the first time she’s in your place.

Some other finishing touches you should seriously consider are towel and interesting reading material. Invest in a nice set of fluffy towels and actually hang them in the bathroom. Purchase a few magazines or bathroom reader books. Pick magazines that reflect your personality and interests.

You do have interests outside of video games don’t you?

Note: no maxim magazine. Having Maxim basically says that you don’t have anything better to do with your time except look at scantily clad women and it also says that you don’t have enough balls to buy Playboy. If you’re going to buy magazines to ogle women, at least buy the real thing.
Lastly, fix the damn door lock. No one wants to walk in on a man doing his business.

The Kitchen

The kitchen is an important and often neglected area. Throw out ALL the trash under the sink. I hate it when I open the door and a cloud of stench comes out and attacks my nostrils. Yuck. Clean the floor just like the bathroom with Pinesol and a mop. No excuses. For your sink, clean it every month with comet and a scourer. If you have to do dishes by hand, you can invest in a few things that will make your life easier such as a glass scrubber and a dish scrubber that has soap inside of the handle. Little tools like that make it easier to do things, and therefore you won’t put it off until the last minute.

Try to organize the things in your kitchen too, silverware, dishes, cooking supplies, don’t just throw them on the shelf and forget they are there. Make it look like you are a man who enjoys cooking and being in the kitchen.

Some supplies that we recommend are:

• A plastic or porcelain cutting board (wood ones are hard to clean bacteria out of)
• Nice silverware or at minimum matching silverware
• Matching plates and bowls
• Cooking pots!
• Last but not least, you should have some Alcohol! Have a bottle of white wine, soda, and some champagne in the fridge at all times! You should also have a bottle of red but keep that in a cool, dry, place (not the fridge).

The Bedroom

All the things discussed earlier apply to the bedroom. This is a bit about cleaning your apartment, so we’ll not go into specifics about setting your bedroom up for seduction and entertainment.

The Extras

There are a few extra things we feel are very important to give you that extra edge in your place. Some basic things are candles, incense (if you aren’t allergic to smoke), massage elements, and of course WINE!

When you decorate your place, if you use things that represent places you’ve been, or things you’ve done, you have easy conversation starters that aren’t made-up BS.
Conclusion

It’s very basic simple stuff, clean your apartment, because a dirty one will just be marks against you. Why chance it. It doesn’t have to be spotless, sterile, and cold. Just not filthy, and seriously, a lot of guy’s apartments are filthy.

HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT!

Aha! You thought it was over. Well, we are not going to make it easy on you. Here is YOUR homework assignment. Pick 3 things you need for your apartment. Cleaning supplies, candles, kitchen utensils, whatever! Now go and buy those things. But here is the hitch, you must get 3 other person’s opinions about the items you are going to purchase! “Excuse me, I’m XYZ shopping, could I get your opinion on something really quick. What do you think about XYZ?” Easy. Maybe explain the style or feel you are going for, feel free to work with it.

Word.

-Kyle and Johnny

If you have any questions or comments or thoughts about the homework assignment, feel free to comment in the area below.